Atlas

Have seen this pop up several times now - but this is the best overview.
Disagree with the closing line: "Paraphrasing is like magic pixie dust you can sprinkle onto any conversation to make it more positive and productive." My experience is when you start doing this, even with the right tone, it seems disingenuous. But this can be overcome by being up front.
"If your roommate says, “I feel like I’ve been doing all the chores lately,” you might object internally with, “That’s not true! I did the dishes this morning!”
"These reactions happen imperceptibly, and we move towards feeling uncomfortable or defensive without knowing how we got there."
Benefit of parahrasing: allows for full understanding on both sides & helps speaker feel understood.
On the need to be understood: "The unconscious fear is that if we aren’t understood it will be as if we never existed."
"Time required to reach conflict resolution is cut in half when each negotiator agrees to accurately repeat what the previous speaker had said"
When to paraphrase: After receiving a request, After receiving feedback, When the speaker is sharing something vulnerable, If you’re unsure of what the speaker meant.
Avoid declarative tone.